Not Priest. The Lady Gaga song. Have I mentioned my love of Gaga? Do I really need to? If you're reading this, you probably already know about it. This is a Lady Gaga post.
I want to go dancing. In a dark club, I mean. The kind where everyone loses their self-consciousness and just moves, without worrying about whether their dancing looks funny. I want to dance in the dark. I want to go to the Monster Ball again, and feel the way I did while I was there, to feel like I was someone, or something, to feel like I was beautiful and powerful, because when I was there, I SCREAMED and wanted to cry with pure joy, because for a couple of hours, I truly loved myself. I loved myself because I was commanded to, because someone roared at a stadium of 18,000 people and said they would love themselves for who they were, because they were born that way. I don't really care if it was bullshit, I don't care if Lady Gaga didn't really mean it. I don't care how far away she was, or that she couldn't see my face. I don't care that she does the same thing almost every night. She was speaking to all of us. She cried, and snarled, and bore her teeth, and sang to us, for us, about us. And it worked.
When I grow up, I want to be like Lady Gaga. I want to be able to say that I love myself, or at least put on a good enough show of loving myself that I can convince everyone else to love themselves too.
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