headache

Literally.  I have a headache.  Think ax blade cleaving into the left side of my skull.  I feel empty or something, and a little sad.  My last week of high school, most of which will be spent taking exams, starts tomorrow.  This is not an "Omg, I'm going to miss you all so much!!!!" post.  This is different.  I don't know how to distinguish it from that.  I'm excited to leave school.  I probably will not miss a lot of people.  But I will miss the ones I love.  I don't know what is going to happen.  I don't even know where I will be this summer.  I need money for school, but I want to see my mom, and let's face it; how can I get a job in rural Virginia? I don't know what to do.  I'm writing like an emotional Meursault.  I wish I could write poetry.  I wish I knew the closest amtrak station to where you will be.


I have a headache and I'm missing you already.